Ruckerverse Saga 7 - Spire-alling Into Madness

It had been five weeks since Mr Rucker had watched Mr Kobran, his new friend, evaporate in his arms. Mr Rucker was depressed, to say the least. Nothing felt to have any life anymore, he bought some clothes, he went downtown, and he tried contacting Chris Pratt to get some company. However, nothing had any life anymore, and Chris Pratt didn’t seem to recognize him after the timeline was fixed. 

After Abraham Lincoln died, the confederates won the war and the timeline was shattered, causing the present day to turn into a place full of slavery, death, and order. Mr Rucker teamed up with Kobran, Chriss Pratt, and Jeffery Bezos to stop them, and after reverting the timeline, it was fixed.

But, after the world was fixed, it seemed like it became worse than slavery for Mr Rucker. He had lost everyone he knew. So, Mr Rucker looked for Charlie Montoya. He hadn’t seen Charlie since they had parted ways and Mr Rucker had retired from working at MBMS. 

Mr Rucker flew over to Charlie’s house, but something was wrong. It was covered entirely in a corrosive black liquid, like the house was being checked for termites or something.

Therefore, Mr Rucker went to the next best place. Mira Costa High School, or MCHS if you want to be a fancy little shitalkimushroom.

However, all the pipes and sewer drains were leaking that same black liquid. Mr Rucker reached into a large pile of it, and it burned his finger off. After it regenerated, Mr Rucker looked around. There was no one in sight, like something had taken them. (Or because it was a weekend.)

Mr Rucker walked around the school and entered the office, where he noticed it was completely trashed. There were papers flung everywhere. Mr Rucker reached down and picked one up, it was a shipment of edible deodorant from Axe. Mr Rucker recognized “edible deodorant” from somewhere, but he couldn’t put his finger on it. (Maybe because it had just been burned off.)

Later, Mr Rucker burst into a factory labeled with Ax Deodorant. He held up his hands, which were flaming with blue fire, and cleared his throat. 

“Can anyone here tell me what you shipped to Mira Costa High School?” He announced. No one responded. Mr Rucker waited a few seconds before he began walking down the aisle created by all the staring workers. “Hello?” He asked. “Anyone?”

Suddenly, he heard a splash. He flew into the air and saw that one of the vats of deodorant had been opened. He could see it sloshing around, despite it being powered off. Mr Rucker landed next to it and held out his hand, reached in, but something quickly leaped out, latched itself onto his arm, and tried to pull it in. Mr Rucker tried to blast the thing off, but it wouldn’t budge. 

Mr Rucker flew away, but the thing still had its grasp on his arm, causing it to get torn off. Mr Rucker went flying, slamming his back into the roof before falling onto the catwalks below. He was nearly unconscious.

The workers approached him, but something was off. He couldn’t tell because his vision was blurred from the pain. Something tall crawled up behind them and rose to its feet. It dripped with a glowing blue liquid. It growled, but didn’t seem to attack the workers.

One of them picked up Mr Rucker and looked in his eyes. Mr Rucker’s vision finally came back, and he noticed what was wrong. The worker’s bodies were ripped in some areas, with blue deodorant spilling out of the cuts. He didn’t see any blood, any flesh. It was like they’d imploded.

Mr Rucker used the last of his strength to send a shockwave in all directions, causing the catwalk below him to explode and the worker holding him was thrown back, toppling all of the others. Mr Rucker landed on the surviving catwalk, but was shocked as the workers bodies had disappeared, and they had turned into the blue goo. Behind them was the towering figure, a giant gooey-mess shaped like a human that wore a white gas mask to resemble a face. 

It waited a second before leaping into the air, splattering onto the roof. It roared, causing all of the vats to blast open, and all of the goo to cover the walls and ceiling. 

“I should probably get out of here.” Mr Rucker said, gulping. He shot up, but slammed his head on the goo-covered roof. It was hardening, and turning black. 

Mr Rucker noticed that a small area of the walls had not been covered yet, so he flew upwards and then blasted towards it as fast as possible. It was covered by blue goo before he could get to it, but because it wasn’t hardened yet, he went right through it.

He slammed into the sidewalk and looked back, where the ax building was completely covered in black goo, just like Charlie’s house. Mr Rucker stepped back as the entire building collapsed, the goo completely consuming it. Mr Rucker flew into the air, but saw that the gas mask still remained in the pile of goo. 

Suddenly, a giant black gooey hand sprung out of the mess and tried to grab him, but he dodged out of the way. Mr Rucker held up his hand and shot a laser that blasted a hole in the hand, but it wasn’t phased. It slammed down to the right, nearly crushing Mr Rucker, but he stepped back. 

The large monster crawled out of the hand, sporting the gas mask once more and charged at him, but a laser shot down from above, obliterating it and spraying its “guts” all around, even on Mr Rucker. 

He looked up, and there it was, in all its glory, the Amazon Box-Shaped starship. 

Later…

“So, Rucker, I see you’ve got beef with the Seterra as well.” Jeffery Bezos said as Mr Rucker flew in the hatch in the bottom.

“How do you know my name? In this timeline I shouldn’t have met you.” 

“I’ve heard of the man who killed Mr Kobran, you’re kinda famous among us celestials of Earth.” Bezos explained.

“Actually,” Mr Rucker began, “I didn’t kill Mr Rucker, my friend Charlie Montoenails did, but I can’t seem to find him.”

“We know where he is.” A voice said. Mr Rucker turned around.

“JOE BIDEN!?” Mr Rucker yelped.

“Good to see you old friend.” Joe said, stepping into the room.

“How’ve you been?”

“Fine, I’ve been slurring my speech a little but otherwise I’m fine.

Then, Mr Rucker looked out the window in the front of the ship and noticed that they’d been moving. In the distance, he saw something tall and black.

“What’s that?” Mr Rucker asked.

“A Seterra Spire,” Bezos answered, “we think Charlie’s there. It seems to be the source of the Seterra all across the world. We think that if we destroy it, we can erase the Seterra off the planet forever.”

“How would we blow it up though?”

“Well,” Biden began, “we can’t get close to it ‘cuz we don’t know what it would do, so we need to go in there on foot and see if we can collapse it from the inside.”

Suddenly, a thermonuclear bomb rolled down the stairs and into the room.

“OH NO!” Rucker yelled. “Someone’s trying to kill us!”

Biden scratched the top of the bomb. “No,” he said, “this is my pet nuclear bomb! Who’s a good boy, who’s a good boy?” 

“Hold up…” Mr Rucker said. “That thing ain’t alive. It ain’t a dog either.”

“Yeah, it is. And I’ll bring him on our little adventure!” He proclaimed. Rucker looked at Bezos for assistance, but he just sighed and let Joe bring the bomb.

It was easy getting inside the spire, as there were multiple entrances throughout it. They walked down a hallway, which was made of black goo sporting red glowing orbs spirnkled around like holes in a tree. 

“Hey guys! This looks like a staircase to get to the top! We should see what’s up there!” Biden said before breaking into the room at the end of the hall and ran up the staircase. Then, he tripped and fell down the stairs like he did many times before, and the nuclear bomb went flying. 

Rucker stepped into the room and gasped. In the middle was a smaller spire, looking like a tree trunk. The tendrils making up the mini-spire were wrapped around something glowing white. Mr Rucker reached inside and moved away the tendrils. It was the Seterrablade…

“What’s that?” Bezos asked.

“This is the Seterrablade, I made it for Charlie when I created him. I guess this means Charlie’s here too…” Rucker explained.

Suddenly, something burst into the room and held out its hand. The Seterrablade flew into the figure’s hand. It was Charlie. His eyes were glowing white, and he was wrapped with black tendrils in certain areas. 

“Charlie?”

“Hello, Rucker. Nice to see you again… is what I would say if it was nice. But here I see you trying to steal my precious sword.” Charlie replied in a distorted voice, stabbing the edge of the Seterrablade into the ground.

“What happened to you?”

“I found my true purpose, Jed. I have bonded with the Seterra and created new life! This reality is too broken for its liking, so I will erase it and build a new one, no people, no biological life, no you.” Charlie explained.

“You’re insane, Charlie, we can help you! Just come with us!” Rucker said. Then, Charlie held up his arm and launched the Seterra blade at him, but he took a step to the right, and it barely missed his head. He turned his head and looked into the reflection of the blade, seeing himself as an inky mess. 

He turned back round and saw Charlie leaping towards him. However, Biden threw the thermonuclear bomb at him, knocking him out of the air.

“That’s it!” Bezos cried. “We’ll use the thermonuclear bomb to blow this place sky high!”

“But we would need to stay behind and activate the bomb from here!” Rucker added.

“I’ll d-do it.” Joe said. “I’m just a human, you two are very important to our survival. You guys need to get out of here.”

Rucker and Bezos nodded. Suddenly, Charlie grabbed his Seterra blade and swung it, but Bezos pulled out an expensive anime sword and blocked the blow. The three of them backed into the hallway again and Rucker pulled the door back together.

Biden picked up his thermonuclear bomb and held it above his head.

“Thanks, Biden. You’ll be remembered.” Rucker said.

“Truin-derdash-dubba-da-presher!!!” Biden yelped before he began to dust away. The Thermonuclear bomb dropped to the floor, getting a small scrape, before rolling away.

“What’s happening!?” Bezos yelled.

“I’ve been alive for too long, I guess I’m too old for my body to handle! Sorry guys, it’s JOEVER.” Suddenly, he completely dusted away, leaving only his ashes behind.

“NO!” Rucker yelled. “Now we’re gonna need to find someone else to sacrifice!”

Suddenly, the door blasted open and Charlie walked in on four inky-spider legs, and grabbed the bomb.

“It’s now or never, Rucker!” Bezos ordered. “We need to blow up the bomb or else we’ll never defeat the Seterra!” 

Mr Rucker looked at Charlie. “No.” He said. Mr Rucker grabbed Bezos and the two rocketed out of the spire as they heard as Charlie screamed for them to come back.

When they reached the starship and went inside, Bezos yelled in anger. “No! Rucker, you’ve doomed us all! That was our only chance!”

“Wait!” Rucker yelped. “I have an idea.”

Mr Rucker walked into the control room and guided the ship above the spire. He pulled a lever that began to power up the laser from the bottom hatch.

“No!” Bezos said. “That won’t work! It needs to charge!”

Suddenly, the ship shook, causing the two of them to collapse against the wall. Black tendrils shot out from the top of the spire and wrapped around the amazon box-shaped starship. 

Mr Rucker got up and pulled the lever to turn on the jets, but their power wasn’t enough, and the ship was crushed under the tendrils and exploded in the sky…