The New Kingdom War

Ron Al Danmann

Article submitted though legacy submissions on 10/11/2023, so some information may be out of date

There has recently been a large-scale war starting to appear into the world's eyes, and it has been severely impacting the economy in recent times. This war has become a huge part of our lives now, especially if you live in the New Kingdom. So we will explain how this all started, including all of the Lore. So we have to start all the way at the beginning...

There is a large slideshow called Untitled Presentation(Kingdom). It was the first Kingdom slideshow with around 100 people and 100 slides. These slides were prospering; but one day, Jones decided to delete all the slides. (Don't worry, they're recovered now!) To solve this problem, Max Egbuonu decided to make "The New Kingdom", which would basically be just like the old kingdom, except there would be all new slides. It started out simple, but slowly became a larger kingdom. Many inhabitants decided to settle there, including Amogus, Shrek, Trollface, Doge, Cheems, Grimace, Putin, Obama, Joe Biden, Mario, Earl Devereaux, Bobux Man, and more. This New Kingdom also gave rise to many powerful corporations, such as Amogus Inc. Eventually, everyone just relaxed and went about everyday work as the kingdom's popularity and size grew, and new buildings popped up all over the place. [Special mention to the Military Store and Homeless Man Memes for being the first places in The New Kingdom].

But all of the inhabitants' good times were about to change, because of the start of a war. The war between Doge and Trollface. The reason this war started is still unknown, and only Doge and Trollface know the true reason why they're fighting. While many wars between these two clans are going on around the world, the biggest fights and the most fighting is happening in The New Kingdom. The troops here are the Such Patrol troop 990, and the Troll Patrol troop 149. These two troops alone have caused more wreckage and casualties than any of the other troops combined, and this is really scaring the inhabitants of the New Kingdom. Many of the memes are trying to stay out of this, but others think that there is no choice but to join the war. Doge's base is located in an unknown location somewhere in either Russia or Belarus, and is a futuristic floating spaceship in the sky. While not much is known about the base, it is for sure that the Doge seems to be the more heavily supplied and more battle-ready side in this war. The Trollface Base, on the other hand, is a medieval castle located near Ohio, U.S.A. The castle is heavily guarded by Trollfaces with Ak-47s, and their leader also resides there. The Doge leader is Dogus IV, and he comes from a long line of military generals, but a pretty generic buff doge. The Trollface leader is much more complex. They claim that their leader is Distorted Trollface, but some others more advanced in lore believe that the true leader is the Red Distorted Trollface, and that the Trollfaces are hiding it for some unknown reason.

The very first battle in this war was the Battle at Memes River, on the North border of The New Kingdom. In this battle, Doge tried to take control of the Memrie Fort owned by Trollface, but failed to defend it as Doge eventually took over. Later that night, the second battle happened, the Battle at the McDonald's Parking lot, where Doge and Trollface fought seemingly for no reason, and the battle just happened to happen in the McDonald's parking lot. (Doge Won) The next day, the Battle at the Burger King Bathroom happened, with Trollface taking the victory after flushing many Doges down the toilet and giving many swirlies. After that, the Doge and Trollface tried something different; trying to take control over all of the world's major Meme News Corporations. This could easily be done by taking control over the main headquarters of them, and they all just happened to be located right next to each other in The New Kingdom. So on Tuesday, the clans fought for many hours to take control of the Deanster Weekly, where Doge ended up winning. The next day, Doge and Trollface would fight again, but this time, for control of The Weekly Meme. Now, this is huge, as The Weekly Meme is the largest Meme Newspaper in the entire world, so this fight went on for TWO DAYS. Eventually, Doge got worn out and Trollface took control. Lastly, they fought for control of The Amogus times, where Doge won.

Just yesterday, the clans fought again at Putin's Car Wash, and Doge ended up beating the Trollface. Some memes say that they are being pressured by Doge and Trollface, and their friend memes want to either support or go against things like this. This is leading many meme critics to believe that various memes might join a side of the war if some of the pressure gets too out of hand.

Now, the war is not over, so we will still be eager to see what is going to happen with the two sides, and what the end result might be. We cannot promise anymore updates on this war, because i'm too lazy to write another one of these, so we hope you now have a better understanding about the war that is taking over the world.